I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
