is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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