Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
