the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I'm passing your future prison.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Randomize
