i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
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