My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
Randomize
