Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
i think i scared a bird with my dick
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
