so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
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