i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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