You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
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