Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
Randomize