Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
