apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Randomize
