All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Mom found my vibrator. all the said was 'wow, I've never seen one like this before.'
we don't live in the stone age anymore, mom
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
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