Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
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