Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
