the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
