i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
I had to download the flashlight app so I could finish taking a dump when the power went out.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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