just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Randomize
