i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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