I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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