You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
I cut my penus on the lid.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
