Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize
