She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
