I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
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