I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
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