omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
its not stalking. its research.
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
