The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Randomize
