Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Randomize
