whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Randomize
