Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize
