Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize
