jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Randomize
