he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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