Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
