Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
