Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
Terrible idea I love it
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Randomize
