I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
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