Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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