I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
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