At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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