My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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