no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
how do flat chested girls get laid?
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
Randomize
