I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
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