it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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