The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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