In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Randomize
