Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
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