so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Randomize
