it hurts more in the daytime
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
two words: eviction party
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
